...or does anybody else out there think that Hugo Chavez is in the end stages of tertiary syphilis??? He just gets loonier by the day. I've listened to his annoying rants and rages for too damned long. And they just keep getting stranger and stranger. He hates freaking everybody. And everything. He's managed to nationalize everything in sight short of the moon, he's selectively line-vetoed his country's constitution down to a Cliff Notes version, he thinks America, as always, is the greatest evil since Cthulu and is known to have 6 hour long "fireside chats" over the country's airwaves, which, by the way he totally controls. I gotta nanoseconds worth of patience for that mind-numbing turd!!!
Anyway, have you heard his latest bit of wisdom? It's just too wonderfully weird for words. He is now at the symposium for World Water Day (I have NO idea why) where he was a featured speaker. ?????
He began his speech by saying that the great civilizations on Mars were destroyed by capitalism. Yeah, I'm not kidding. In his opinion, the noble Martian society was brought down by capitalism, imperialism and perhaps a bit too many sub-prime mortgages. No doubt brought there by America. How many old 1950's science fiction DVD's does this whacko have in his collection???
His second point was that the world is running out of water. As he downed two pitchers of the stuff at the podium. Well, thanks a lot you son-of-a-bitch for pounding down my share of what's left!!! Has he never seen a satellite photo??? They're called oceans, you idiot!!! Has he never been to the coast of his own country??? It's called the Caribbean Sea!!! Has he never heard of global warming??? Trust me, Hugo, in a couple of decades or less we're all going to be up to out tits in water!!! Literally.
He then closed by stating that the U.S. only attacked Libya for its water. Again, a satellite photo you fool. Libya is a freaking desert!!! A gazillion square miles of sun parched, dry, burning desert!!! Even they import their water through Evian's online site!!! Apparently slaughtering your own people to allow you the privilege of choking the survivors to death really is a warm and fuzzy kind of thing to this nut.
I want to build a trebuchet big enough to launch Hugo all the way to Cuba where he hopefully lands in his good buddy, Castro's, lap. And trust me, NOBODY wants to be in Castro's lap right now. His Depends might be full!!! SO NOT PRETTY!!!
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