OMg, it's the End of Days!!! This could only happen in west Texas. Just how loony are those cow pokers???
Have you heard about this? It's stupifyingly frightening to say the least. First, they build a man made lake with no real fresh water feeding into it. STEE-RIKE ONE! They are now in one of the worst droughts since the Dust Bowl and the lake is about 10-percent of it's original size. STEE-RIKE TWO!! It full of dead, rotting fish, smells like a sewer and has turned blood red. STEE-RIKE THREE!!! Of course, none of these things has anything to do with science, reason or reality. IT IS THE END OF DAYS!!! Yes, this is the Nile River of west Texas. They're all shaking in their c'boy boots down there, waving hands full of snakes at the sky and stocking up at the local Wal-Mart. News reports say that there is not a single tube of Pringle's, a 12-pack of Barq's rootbeer, a Moon Pie or any Kodiak "chew" left on the shelves. May they all lock themselves into their single-wides and await the outcome. With the windows closed. In the heat. Good riddance!!!
You idiots, it's an algae bloom on a dead lake that should have never been built in the first place!!! This thing must smell just lovely in early August. I have one question though... Some reports call this a lake. Other reports call it a reservoir. You swam and fished in this nightmare??? This cluster fuck was your water supply??? You actually drank, bathed and cooked from this thing??? No wonder the Wal-Mart pharmacy is doing such a land office business. And that most of you have one eye and three thumbs!!!
This is not, I repeat, NOT a portent from god!!! If it were she would have smote y'all several generations ago just to get you off of her desert and clear out all of those cars on cement blocks you seem to love so much.
Personally, as you all know, I am not a big fan of water. I never have been. I really do shower with a life preserver on. I hate water. It's just my nature. Y'know why? FISH FUCK IN IT!!!
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