As you know by now, I'm a produce whore. Give me fresh seasonal stuff and I will tap dance and play a fiddle on your roof. I come from a long line of farmers and gardeners who knew what they were doing. I grew up with so much fresh, home grown stuff it hurt. I loved it. Yeah, good times and good eats...
It is now late June and the bing cherries are coming in from Washington state. Dirt cheap. The stores are overrun with them and I am buying them by the bag full. It's fucking wonderful!!! In about two weeks the ones from 'sconsin will be hitting the market. Again, fucking wonderful!!! I am addicted to these things. They are sort of like my own personal form of crack. I dearly remember grandmas front porch with a bowl full of these things, chowing down and just spitting pits into the petunias. Yeah, really good times.
I have so far destroyed two Polo shirts because I'm pretty much a messy eater. OK, I'll admit it, I drool a bit. Food is my drug of choice and I take no prisoners. It's not pretty. Sea Squirt just sort of sets back in horror and watches me make a mess of myself. Hey, I make no excuses... Don't even ask how many shirts I laid waste to with last months fresh strawberries. It's actually kind of sad. If food were a china shop then I would definitely be the bull. Sea Squirt has just had to sit back and watch me lay waste to acres of fabric. Again, kind of sad...
Next month gets really fun though. Concord grapes start coming into season..They're heavenly. Trust me, if I could figure out a way to freebase those things I'd be doing it!!! Food and I have truly strange relationship...And they stain like nothing you can possibly imagine. Hell, by the time my birthday rolls around I'm going to be completely purple. Head to toe. And there may not be a wearable piece of clothing in the closest. I love it. And then the local corn crop starts to show up... Ain't nothing more fun than a lap full of melted butter. Trust me on this one, I do indeed know what I'm talking about.
Well, now... me and corn have special bond. Sort of like the one that I have with potatoes. It's a weird addiction. Hell, I'll tap dance with both of them. I have so many butter stains on my clothes it hurts. I only eat corn from a local farm here, it's freaking heavenly. I buy it by the bushel full and pack the freezer full of it. Yeah, it's that good. And then I spend the rest of the year just dropping it all over myself. Life is good.. Yeah, I eat like a pig... yep, smile on my face!!!
I count myself lucky. I live in a part of the country that is full of farms, farmers, rich soil and people that know what to do with it. To them, I bow. Keep it going. You feed my belly, you keep me going and you make me sing!! Thank you for the goodies THANK YOU!!!!
Sunday, June 29, 2014
Saturday, June 28, 2014
A TSUNAMI OF MEMORIES...
Oh, goddess. Sometimes shit just happens. I am on the precipice of my 61st birthday. I'm not quite sure were I am with that yet. The right side of my brain is panicked and saying "Dude, you're older than mold". Yeah, pretty. But the left side of my brain (which btw, I love dearly) is telling me to cut loose and cause some trouble. I like the sound of that. Now you know why I like the left side of my brain...
So, I'm sitting at the computer this morning and an earthquake of memories came back to me. The summer of 1959. I was about to turn 6 years old. I was spending the summer with my grandparents in Kinmundy, Illinois. It's a town about the size of a postage stamp. Ahh, yes, the South. They lived right next to the rail road tracks. And right across the street from a huge vacant lot full of peonies. Their back yard was full of hollyhocks and the occasional snake or two. They had a burning barrel. And a "glider" on the front porch that I was constantly rocking in as I enjoyed the strawberries that I had raided out of the garden. And occasionally their next door neighbors garden as well. I was a notorious produce thief. Hey, I was a precocious little shit. Surprised???
That was the summer I decided to go into business for myself. An entrepreneur, if you will. Yeah, I opened a drink stand out by the side walk. Two gallon jars, a card table, one of grandpa's "ceegar" boxes with a couple of nickles in it so I could make change and a horridly self made sign that said "Lenomade and Gape Dink". Only 5 cents a cup. I'm not sure if I looked like an abandoned child or an indentured slave out there. But my first day I made damned near 2 dollars. Hell, I felt like a Rockefeller!!! So, of course, after dinner I go charging down the hill, past the peonies to Jesse George's General Store to spend my nickles.I was in heaven!!! I snagged 4 different flavors of Fizzy's, some cherry licorice, a balsa wood airplane and a Spud Gun. (If none of that makes any sense to you then you need to use Google). The Spud Gun thing would eventually become an issue of enormous proportion and my aunt Margaret and I would never talk again. To this day I still harbor some issues of that incident.
Yeah, all this came flooding back to me this morning. I started laughing so damned hard I actually slipped out of the chair and ended up on the floor in tears. Then I stared giggling. Once again, not pretty. I loved it!!! To be transported back a little more than half of a century and reacquaint myself with the little melon headed, garden raiding and happy thing that I was... It was delicious. I can still smell the burning barrel and the hollyhocks.
Hmmm, maybe 61 doesn't sound all that bad when I think about it again...
So, I'm sitting at the computer this morning and an earthquake of memories came back to me. The summer of 1959. I was about to turn 6 years old. I was spending the summer with my grandparents in Kinmundy, Illinois. It's a town about the size of a postage stamp. Ahh, yes, the South. They lived right next to the rail road tracks. And right across the street from a huge vacant lot full of peonies. Their back yard was full of hollyhocks and the occasional snake or two. They had a burning barrel. And a "glider" on the front porch that I was constantly rocking in as I enjoyed the strawberries that I had raided out of the garden. And occasionally their next door neighbors garden as well. I was a notorious produce thief. Hey, I was a precocious little shit. Surprised???
That was the summer I decided to go into business for myself. An entrepreneur, if you will. Yeah, I opened a drink stand out by the side walk. Two gallon jars, a card table, one of grandpa's "ceegar" boxes with a couple of nickles in it so I could make change and a horridly self made sign that said "Lenomade and Gape Dink". Only 5 cents a cup. I'm not sure if I looked like an abandoned child or an indentured slave out there. But my first day I made damned near 2 dollars. Hell, I felt like a Rockefeller!!! So, of course, after dinner I go charging down the hill, past the peonies to Jesse George's General Store to spend my nickles.I was in heaven!!! I snagged 4 different flavors of Fizzy's, some cherry licorice, a balsa wood airplane and a Spud Gun. (If none of that makes any sense to you then you need to use Google). The Spud Gun thing would eventually become an issue of enormous proportion and my aunt Margaret and I would never talk again. To this day I still harbor some issues of that incident.
Yeah, all this came flooding back to me this morning. I started laughing so damned hard I actually slipped out of the chair and ended up on the floor in tears. Then I stared giggling. Once again, not pretty. I loved it!!! To be transported back a little more than half of a century and reacquaint myself with the little melon headed, garden raiding and happy thing that I was... It was delicious. I can still smell the burning barrel and the hollyhocks.
Hmmm, maybe 61 doesn't sound all that bad when I think about it again...
Sunday, June 15, 2014
RAIN...
Oh, goddess, I love rain! I have no idea why but rain makes me sing. It makes my heart race. It gives me the opportunity to dance wildly in puddles like Gene Kelly. And to run naked through the neighborhood. OK, you probably don't want to take that exit. TMI...
I love rain. Whether it is a sprinkle or a monsoon. And goddess, I have been through them both. My intermittent wipers have served me well for decades. And then I have literally been pounded to my knees in the Tropics in the middle of something of Biblical proportions. I have been in the middle of flash flooding that would scare the scales off of you. I have witnessed SUV's floating down streets and stairways turn into water features that you could literally white water raft in. Yeah, I've seen me a whole shit load of water...
I can count at least 4 time zones (that I can remember) and two hemispheres when I have literally been beaten down to my knees by rain. Yeah, some big stuff. Oh, have mercy, I have been subjected to rain that words just cannot describe. And I have loved it all. Well, once I got finished being scared shitless at what was washing done the hill...
It is raining at the moment. A nice, gentle June rain. I am in heaven. BTW, I am taking my clothes off as I type...
I love rain. Whether it is a sprinkle or a monsoon. And goddess, I have been through them both. My intermittent wipers have served me well for decades. And then I have literally been pounded to my knees in the Tropics in the middle of something of Biblical proportions. I have been in the middle of flash flooding that would scare the scales off of you. I have witnessed SUV's floating down streets and stairways turn into water features that you could literally white water raft in. Yeah, I've seen me a whole shit load of water...
I can count at least 4 time zones (that I can remember) and two hemispheres when I have literally been beaten down to my knees by rain. Yeah, some big stuff. Oh, have mercy, I have been subjected to rain that words just cannot describe. And I have loved it all. Well, once I got finished being scared shitless at what was washing done the hill...
It is raining at the moment. A nice, gentle June rain. I am in heaven. BTW, I am taking my clothes off as I type...
Saturday, June 14, 2014
WHY??? SOMEBODY PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS TO ME!!!
As a species we are monsters of unimaginable proportion. All you have to do is open a history book. Trust me, it will scare the feathers off of you. We don't give a rats ass about anything. Including ourselves. We have turned on each other with a vengeance for millennia. Fuck, we've actually honed it down to a science. Yeah, we've actually managed to perfect it. And "perfect" is so NOT the right word in any way, shape or form!!! Push come to shove, we make a rabid pack of hyenas look warm and fuzzy...
Why is it that at least once a decade we decide to go just full blown bat shit crazy and turn on each other? I have, in my 6 decades seen so much cruelty and violence it crushes my soul. Whether it be a mindless drive by shooting or genocide. If either of those things, or everything in between doesn't make you cringe then you have no heart or grey matter worth counting.
It saddens me to think that we will follow the carrot on a stick, no matter who is holding the stick and what dark alley they are leading us into. And yet, we do it. Willingly. Hitler. Well, enough said on that one...
If even a fraction of the info coming out of Irag right is true it's a a FUCKING NIGHTMARE over there right now. Mass executions. Beheadings for not being a "believer". WTF is up with that noise??? C'mon, you all know me, I joke about religion at the drop of a hat. I refer to the "goddess" for no other reason than to piss of the Republicans and I'm really quite good at that. But this is insane. It reduces us to a depth so low, so evil and so horrid that I think we have just reached a new low point that is quite possibly unimaginable.
Zealot's scare the scare the scales off of me. Yeah, I'll stand up for what I believe in but I'm not going to start beheading people because they don't believe in what I do. Bitch slap them? Oh, hell yeah! (Trust me, I can bitch slap you into the next time zone!) Behead them? That would be a BIG negatory!!! Nor will I arm myself up to my tits in assault weapons and go nuts.
I just can't wrap my brain around why we keep on insisting to do this bullshit. Again, hyenas....
How sad...
Why is it that at least once a decade we decide to go just full blown bat shit crazy and turn on each other? I have, in my 6 decades seen so much cruelty and violence it crushes my soul. Whether it be a mindless drive by shooting or genocide. If either of those things, or everything in between doesn't make you cringe then you have no heart or grey matter worth counting.
It saddens me to think that we will follow the carrot on a stick, no matter who is holding the stick and what dark alley they are leading us into. And yet, we do it. Willingly. Hitler. Well, enough said on that one...
If even a fraction of the info coming out of Irag right is true it's a a FUCKING NIGHTMARE over there right now. Mass executions. Beheadings for not being a "believer". WTF is up with that noise??? C'mon, you all know me, I joke about religion at the drop of a hat. I refer to the "goddess" for no other reason than to piss of the Republicans and I'm really quite good at that. But this is insane. It reduces us to a depth so low, so evil and so horrid that I think we have just reached a new low point that is quite possibly unimaginable.
Zealot's scare the scare the scales off of me. Yeah, I'll stand up for what I believe in but I'm not going to start beheading people because they don't believe in what I do. Bitch slap them? Oh, hell yeah! (Trust me, I can bitch slap you into the next time zone!) Behead them? That would be a BIG negatory!!! Nor will I arm myself up to my tits in assault weapons and go nuts.
I just can't wrap my brain around why we keep on insisting to do this bullshit. Again, hyenas....
How sad...
Monday, June 9, 2014
LIFE IS MUCH TOO IMPORTANT TO EVER BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!!!
Oh, Goddess, I am looking at an exit ramp that is so incredibly strange. And Sea Squirt and I are doing our damnedest to try to pull it off by this weekend. It involves a couple of good friends (fiends???) on both sides, the First National Church of Elvis and the County Clerks Office.
I don't know where to start on this one. Oh, hell, I'll just jump right into the deep end. Do NOT fuck with me. I actually know how to kill with my bare hands. Trust me on this one. I'm a handful of weeks away from turning 61. Yeah, I got some experience under my skirt...
OK, about 5 years ago 'sconsin put a referendum on the ballet that didn't actually turn down same sex marriage as much as it "defined" marriage. Yeah, that would be one man and one woman. It passed. It actually changed our states constitution. And in complete violation of it. I ruffled up all of my feathers, tripled my size and went just full blown bat shit crazy. Yeah, it was that bad. I was outraged. And for those of you out there who have known me long enough, well, you know all too well how easily I can do this sort of chaos. That it was not challenged immediately shocked me. Last week a Federal judge said "I don't think so, Cupcake". I did a happy dance of such severity it hurt.
As a caveat, in principle I do not believe in "marriage". Who the hell thought that nightmare up??? But you do what you have to do. It actually does have some perks. However, with an hour and a half with a lawyer you can pretty much accomplish the same thing. Yet, it can still be challenged. That's NOT fair.
Do I believe in"marriage"? Hell no!!! Do I believe in the legal rights it gives you? Oh, hell YES!!! Why it takes that single legal document to give you sanctity and some legal rights to make decisions when all hell breaks loose confuses the bloody shit out of me.
Sea Squirt and I are about to grab the moment. Goddess know why but we are in the process of doing something totally silly this weekend. Sorry, I have to stop giggling. This is SO out of nowhere and SO out of anything that I believe or support but... Sea Squirt and I are getting married this weekend. Even if the ruling is overturned or put on stay we will be grandfathered in. In 27 states. I love that!!!
Here's to a warm body in the middle of the night. And two opposing forces who can clash on a battle field and just butt heads and still manage to curl up around each other under the sheets a couple of hours later. Sometimes, it just works. And that is so fucking delicious it just makes you drool on your pillow. In the words of Jackie Kennedy: "Your first marriage is for love. Your second marriage is for security. Everything after that is about companionship." I am his third, he is my fourth. It all makes so much truth to me now. Happy dance!!!
Yeah, life sometimes deals you a winning hand. Hey, ain't nothing better than a damn good poker face and a race in your heartbeat. Overall, I have been one of the lucky ones. And thank the Goddess for that gift...
I don't know where to start on this one. Oh, hell, I'll just jump right into the deep end. Do NOT fuck with me. I actually know how to kill with my bare hands. Trust me on this one. I'm a handful of weeks away from turning 61. Yeah, I got some experience under my skirt...
OK, about 5 years ago 'sconsin put a referendum on the ballet that didn't actually turn down same sex marriage as much as it "defined" marriage. Yeah, that would be one man and one woman. It passed. It actually changed our states constitution. And in complete violation of it. I ruffled up all of my feathers, tripled my size and went just full blown bat shit crazy. Yeah, it was that bad. I was outraged. And for those of you out there who have known me long enough, well, you know all too well how easily I can do this sort of chaos. That it was not challenged immediately shocked me. Last week a Federal judge said "I don't think so, Cupcake". I did a happy dance of such severity it hurt.
As a caveat, in principle I do not believe in "marriage". Who the hell thought that nightmare up??? But you do what you have to do. It actually does have some perks. However, with an hour and a half with a lawyer you can pretty much accomplish the same thing. Yet, it can still be challenged. That's NOT fair.
Do I believe in"marriage"? Hell no!!! Do I believe in the legal rights it gives you? Oh, hell YES!!! Why it takes that single legal document to give you sanctity and some legal rights to make decisions when all hell breaks loose confuses the bloody shit out of me.
Sea Squirt and I are about to grab the moment. Goddess know why but we are in the process of doing something totally silly this weekend. Sorry, I have to stop giggling. This is SO out of nowhere and SO out of anything that I believe or support but... Sea Squirt and I are getting married this weekend. Even if the ruling is overturned or put on stay we will be grandfathered in. In 27 states. I love that!!!
Here's to a warm body in the middle of the night. And two opposing forces who can clash on a battle field and just butt heads and still manage to curl up around each other under the sheets a couple of hours later. Sometimes, it just works. And that is so fucking delicious it just makes you drool on your pillow. In the words of Jackie Kennedy: "Your first marriage is for love. Your second marriage is for security. Everything after that is about companionship." I am his third, he is my fourth. It all makes so much truth to me now. Happy dance!!!
Yeah, life sometimes deals you a winning hand. Hey, ain't nothing better than a damn good poker face and a race in your heartbeat. Overall, I have been one of the lucky ones. And thank the Goddess for that gift...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)