A Week And Counting...

Oh, fuck me.  58.  In dog years that's dead.  Really dead.  Totally dead!!!  Like, icky old and dead.  Side of the road dead...

I am gray, balding (bald???), have more back and ear hair than an alpha male silver back gorilla, eyebrows that rival an old growth forest and three nipples.  I occasionally lift up my right man boob just to say hi to "Laverne".  She so rarely sees the sun.  She's my favorite nipple.  I've been known to send her a Hallmark greeting card...  Bottom line, I look like a ziplock bag full of half set Jell-o on a bad day...

I have more hair than most primates should ever be allowed to have but most of mine is in the wrong places.  Men do not lose their hair, it just migrates "south".  Don't ask...  It's not pretty.

I am about to turn 58.  I have survived my childhood, my past, my mistakes, my mother and several diseases, the most recent being skin cancer.  I am most proudly a roller coaster ride, a chain smoker and a heavy drinker.  If I could strap myself in, inhale it, snort it or knock it back in a shot glass I was happy as hell to buy a ticket and take the ride.  What can I say, we're not here for a long time, we're here for a good time...

I have gladly embraced crazies, loonies and wackos my entire life and have happily gotten into the back seat with all of them as they drove down deserted country roads with the headlights off.  I honestly don't think I could have survived any other way.  Some of them for just a few years, some for more than a quarter of a century and some who I have found dead in the basement in the middle of the night.  I thank them all whole heartedly for the journey.  You were all worth the price of admission...

It takes a village to raise a lunatic and I have had the privilege to have had the strangest village imaginable at my disposal .  You have ALL been a gift, a treasure and a learning curve that I will hold in my heart forever.
Without all of you I would not be who I  am today...

Thank you with all of my heart!!!

FUCK 58!!!  Let's go for a Friday Night Fish Fry at Brother's Three and knock back some cocktails while the lake perch is being battered!!!    I can't think of anything better!!!  :-)